The Week in Reverse

By Marty Padgett July 23rd, 2006

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Despite all the flesh-eating, zombies are actually known for their impeccable dental hygiene.

First, Zeppelin gets canned as Cadillac's theme music of choice (please tell us Dave Matthews has not gotten any calls from Modernista!). Then Dylan gets his own car-songs show on XM. And completing the nearly-dead troika, Keith Richards has a speeding ticket waived in Arkansas. Forgive us for feeling a little like the last human alive in Dawn of the Dead?

One step forward, two steps back: VW grants us the easy-to-drive, easy-to-pronounce Eos, and then backhands us into "Tiguan," the name for their new compact ute. Times like these make us actually crave more meaningless alphanumerics.

J.D. Power picked Lexus once more as its customer-service kings, with Buick and Cadillac rounding out the top three. Isuzu's dead-last rankings came only as a surprise to the people who didn't know they still sold vehicles here.

Jerry Flint says Billy Ford creates the green monsters now on the company's back by setting absurdly high goals for hybrids, ethanol vehicles and the like. Remember the days when they just promised quality would be Job One?

Meanwhile, if you're still thinking a "green machine" is something with a lovely coast of Icefrost Mist Metallic, check out TCC's All About Green Machines section so you know exactly where to aim your urea. (Hint: not this way.)

The Avalanche: Clever Midgated truck/SUV blend, or ersatz Tonka truck for men with deprived childhoods? Discuss.

And finally this week, automakers are probably celebrating Tiger's win at the British Open, what with all the money they're investing in golf sponsorships. Who's betting that Woods will auction off naming rights to his firstborn? Any takers?

Posted in : Enthusiasts, Industry News, Reviews, Shoppers

Keith Richards Gets Ark. Reprieve, 31 Years Later

By Marty Padgett July 20th, 2006

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A clean driving record is a badge of honor for most of us; for Rolling Stone Keith Richards, it’s probably right up there with waking up in the morning with a pulse. And now “Keef” will be able to drive clean and clear in the state of Arkansas after having a 31-year-old citation expunged from his record. Back in 1975, the AP reports, Richards (shown here in about the most flattering picture we could find) was ticketed for swerving on the road after a lunch stop in Fordyce, where the constabulary wrote him up for reckless driving. Current Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee recently submitted an application for clemency for Richards, 62, to the state’s parole board—and once Huckabee gets their approved order to sign, Richards will be free of the man once again.

Posted in : Enthusiasts, Shoppers

Dylan Does Cars!

By Marty Padgett July 19th, 2006

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Here’s one for the hippies, who are potentially the only folks left on the earth that can still translate Dylanese to English. The folk-rock icon is paying his own homage to the automobile this morning on XM Channel 40, at 10 a.m., focusing his show on hand-picked tunes about the automobile. You’ll hear all the classics, “from Parliament’s My Automobile and Joni Mitchell’s Car on a Hill to Sonny Boy Williamson III’s Pontiac Blues,” XM promises, though we’re not sure if Dylan will include any of the Beach Boys classics we usually hear three times a day, even on the extraterrestrial radio network. Encores of the show will run as follows:
Deep Tracks® - XM 40 - Wednesday, July 19 – 10:00 AM. / Midnight ET; Encores: Fri. – 6:00 PM., Sun. – 8:00 AM., Mon. – 8:00 PM. ET
The Village - XM 15 - Thursday, July 20 - Noon ET, Encores: Sun. - Midnight, Mon. – 6:00 PM., Wed. – 6:00 AM. ET.

Posted in : Enthusiasts, Industry News, Reviews, Shoppers

Page, Plant Become Caddy Has-Beens

By Marty Padgett July 18th, 2006

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Jimmy, Bobby, Bonzo and John: those beloved characters from that ‘70s cock-rock reality show we called Led Zeppelin have been unceremoniously retired from Cadillac advertising. According to Automotive News—the place we turn first for all our Zep news—the five-year-old Caddy campaign featuring the Zep classic “Rock and Roll” is being pushed aside to make way for subtler, more sophisticated ads that will be more “story oriented.” For our money, there isn’t a better story than the wacky band antics involving a certain Hollywood hotel property and a certain species of fish, but Cadillac steadfastly refused to tap on that lore for its ads, which bowed during the 2002 Super Bowl. Cadillac’s ad duties recently were adopted by Modernista!, the same folks that brought you those warm and fuzzy HUMMER ads that won lots of awards but you can’t really remember.

Posted in : Enthusiasts, Industry News, Shoppers

What’s in a Name?

By Marty Padgett July 16th, 2006

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At a time when new automobile names are being spawned like weeds, Detroit observers have to wonder what’s in a name.

Witness Ford’s abandonment of the only-year-old and well-accepted Lincoln Zephyr retro tag in favor of the meaningless MKZ, apparently in response to Cadillac dumping the long established DeVille for DTS. Meanwhile Toyota has maintained the Corolla name since 1968 and Honda the Civic moniker since 1973.

So what do the names Austin, Buick, Cadillac, Chevrolet, and Chrysler mean to you? Not what you think!

Remember the code names Omaha, Utah, and Sword for beaches in the June 6, 1944 Allied invasion of Normandy? Well, the automotive names listed above were those chosen as codes for initial landing points of the planned November 1, 1945, Allied invasion of the eastern shore of mainland Japan’s Kyushu Island.

Likewise, according to an article in the Omaha World Herald nearly 20 years ago, the landings on Kyushu’s southern shore would have been at beaches DeSoto, Duesenberg, Essex, Ford, and Franklin, while Marines landed on the western shore would invade via Pontiac, Reo, Rolls Royce, Saxon, Star, Studebaker, Stutz, Winton, and Zephyr.

Finally, if they were not needed as reserves for any of the other landings, a second force was planned to invade another southern Kyushu bay on November 4 at Hupmobile, LaSalle, Lincoln, Locomobile, Maxwell, Mercedes, Moon, Oldsmobile, Overland, Packard and Plymouth points. As to Dodge and Hudson, the newspaper didn’t say — perhaps they were drop zones for airborne forces. At least the Japanese didn’t name their formidable defenses Accord and Camry.

We should all rejoice that our memories of these names are played out on the fields of the summer’s classic car shows rather than in military cemeteries and history books. —Mike Davis

Posted in : Enthusiasts, Industry News, Reviews, Shoppers