The trend of underwritten weddings—think Star Jones’ shameless sponsor-shopping—is taking on a distinct odor of gasoline this weekend, when a Nevada couple is united in holy matrimony in the beds of HUMMER trucks, hopefully with hundreds of press in attendance.

A skimpy press release this morning says the couple, Sonya Jefferson and Steve Spencer, will get hitched this weekend within inches of the ball hitch of HUMMER trucks, while standing in their trucks, with TEAM HUMMER captain Rod Hall officiating. After the service and the 3-D HUMMER cake, the couple will go off-roading in wedding attire (something sleeveless for the groom, maybe?).

HUMMER points out the Washington state couple are big HUMMER fans and that they will actually get legally married the day prior, since to our knowledge Rod Hall is not an ordained minister, unless the sisters of Our Holy Mother of Baja are handing out collars this week.

The HUMMER wedding is this Friday at 10 a.m. Our question: with HUMMERs playing so prominent a role in the ceremony, what’s left for the wedding night?

What’s new with the H2 these days? Glad you asked.

Over the past several years, we’ve heard plenty about diesels — especially that they’re quieter, more civil, and smoke-free, and that they no longer bring a performance penalty. In Europe, though, there are quite a few models that bring better performance than their gasoline counterparts. Just a short drive in two high-performance, Euro-spec diesel sedans — a 2007 BMW 535d and a 2007 Audi A6 SE 3.0 TDI quattro — this past week was enough make our feelings about diesel a little warmer yet.

Both cars are part of a Bosch demonstration fleet primarily brought over to promote the current state of diesel technology to regulators, politicians, and non-profit groups in California.

The A6 has what we would venture to say is the quietest engine of any diesel we’ve driven yet, including the E-Class Bluetec. The 3.0-liter TDI V-6 makes 233 horsepower — almost as good as the 3.2-liter gasoline direct-injection V-6’s 255 hp — while peak torque stands at 332 lb-ft, compared to the gas A6’s 244 lb-ft. Even more remarkable, the TDI reaches peak torque at 1400 rpm, as opposed to 3250 rpm. With the six-speed Tiptronic, the A6 TDI can dash to 62 mph in 7.1 seconds and to a top speed of 153 miles per hour.

The first part of our route took us up a several-mile-long, six-percent highway grade where traffic moves at about 60 mph. It’s sent several test vehicles into convulsive hunting, as the transmission downshifts and upshifts repeatedly to maintain speed. But the A6 tackled it quietly in sixth gear, with plenty to spare thanks to the plentiful torque.

Then we came back for a spin in the 535d. It was equipped with an M Sport package, which includes sportier suspension tuning, flashier alloys, a racier-looking steering wheel, and sportier interior trim. There’s a 272-hp, 3.0-liter common-rail in-line six underhood, with a very impressive 413 lb-ft of torque. The diesel six far outpowers the 530i, which makes 255 hp and 220 lb-ft, and even exceeds the 360 lb-ft of torque made by the top 550i model’s 4.8-liter gas V-8. By the numbers, with the six-speed auto the 535d can get to 62 mph in only 6.5 seconds and to a top speed of 155 mph.

While the A6 impressed us with its quieter-than-gasoline, unobtrusive, and faster-than-perceived nature (it’s easy to lose track and speed), the 535d knocked our socks off. The six definitely has more of that old diesel character, with a strident clatter just off idle, but at the same time it feels like an old big-block V-8, roaring away from stoplights with a seductive burly sound that sounds a bit like an old M3 at full roar.

American buyers are used to diesel cars as being heavy and mushier than their gasoline counterparts, with dull responses. The 535d — especially with the M package here — runs counter to that stereotype, with a tight ride, quick steering, snappy shifts, and the same dynamic feel you get with BMW’s other sedans.

We intentionally kept the windows rolled down on both of these models, and never caught a whiff of smoke.

In a rather short, aggressive driving loop of just a few miles, we saw converted fuel-economy figures of about 24 miles per gallon on the A6 and, considering the even more stellar performance, 25 miles per gallon on the 5-Series.

Bring them on. They can’t come soon enough.--Bengt Halvorson

Emissions Noose Tightens for Automakers—TheCarConnection.com

Surprise! Or not. There’s a new Shelby convertible coming later in the year, giving us a reason to hang on (well that, and the new Courtney Love solo album).

Jaguar and Land Rover for sale? Are you sure? We don’t agree but Ford does need a cash bomb to go off in its direction. Even among TCCers we’re in disagreement, as Jerry Flint points out.

Austin-Healey is coming back – via the road to Shanghai. Who knew the Chinese were so into ancestor worship, in, like, that way?

GM’s new diesel: it’s smaller and more efficient. That line sounds great for them, but failed to work for us at the clubs.

Larry King-style break time: We don’t care, dammit, we want an iPhone.

So Gibbs may build the Aquada in Michigan. How perfect would that be for Detroiters’ lake-house-to-Tigers-game sensibility? Better make sure it has a locking tonneau, just in case.

MirraChrome may be the next big bling—unless maybe Winston’s wants to hook us up with sapphire-encrusted 20-inch rims? We didn’t think so.

And Jerry Lee Lewis sighs: the Prius has taken a left turn at battery capacity. The next model won’t debut with flame-prone lithium-ion batteries, which also decreases the chance it will use “Great Balls of Fire” in its TV ad run. It’s all about the licensing, bra.

Finally this week, the “Tulsarama!” exhumation of a 1957 Plymouth Belvedere went off script when it turned out to be a rustbucket. But as Geraldo would say, better rust than nothing at all. Watch closely:

There’s no better way of knowing you’ve made it than getting your image on a stamp. Now the Italian Post Office has honored Lamborghini by issuing a Lambo stamp as part of its “Made in Italy” series. Costing €0.85, or about $1, the stamp is actually for the iconic Miura sports car, though it features a reproduction of the distinctive Sant’Agata Bolognese mark, the raging bull on a black background.

If collectors of Lambo memorabilia are thinking of buying one to keep for a while then sell on for a huge profit, think again. With an anticipated production run of 3.5 million stamps over the next few weeks, it’s not exactly going to be rare.—Richard Yarrow

We tend to be a fairly conservative lot, us British drivers. We don’t like to stick out from the crowd too much in case we’re thought of as crass or vulgar. The most popular color to buy a car in has long been silver, but one U.K. company is now offering a variation on that them. Chrome is the new silver, with shiny body panels apparently set to be the next big thing.

MirraChrome is claimed to be the world’s most realistic chrome-effect paint finish, with 98 percent of the reflectivity of true chrome-plating. It’s the stuff was used on a Lamborghini Murcielago in the recent video by rapper 50 Cent.

“There’s plenty of interest in chrome, candy colours and other custom finishes, what with the TV shows [such as Pimp My Ride] and general interest in radical Sixties and Seventies automotive paintwork,” said Ray Penny. He’s manager of the Autopaint centre in Birmingham, England that’s now offering the shiny finish for the first time.

I’m not sure how you’d define “plenty of interest” but I’m not holding my breath until I see a MirraChrome car.—Richard Yarrow